


lost my star

by reversedhymnal (Hymn)



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Experimental Style, Gen, Vague CoM Spoilers, Vague KH2 Spoilers, takes place during kh2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-07-26
Updated: 2006-07-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:40:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22080466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hymn/pseuds/reversedhymnal
Summary: They are walking down the street and the sun is shining. Selphie nudges her shoulder with her own, grin brilliant and open and just a little shy. Kairi smiles back and tries to pretend like she isn't perpetually distracted these days."Hey, Kairi.” Selphie giggles, does a quick twirl of glee. "I amso happythat you're here. Really, you know? I love hanging out with you! It's so muchfun!""Of course, Selphie," Kairi says, with a bemused little grin. "Where else would I be?"(she feels, strangely, hollow)
Relationships: Kairi & Riku & Sora (Kingdom Hearts), Kairi & Sora (Kingdom Hearts)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	lost my star

**Author's Note:**

> orig a/n: this takes place after Sora decides to take a nap, and continues until *gestures at end of fic* that time.
> 
> 1/1/20: minor revisions and SP&G edits

They are walking down the street and the sun is shining. Selphie nudges her shoulder with her own, grin brilliant and open and just a little shy. Kairi smiles back and tries to pretend like she isn't perpetually distracted these days.

"Hey, Kairi.” Selphie giggles, does a quick twirl of glee. "I am _so happy_ that you're here. Really, you know? I love hanging out with you! It's so much _fun_!"

"Of course, Selphie," Kairi says, with a bemused little grin. "Where else would I be?"

(she feels, strangely, hollow)

*

Kairi frowns into the dressing room mirror. The light is dim, soft, and makes everything look rich and muted. She thinks that's because people are too afraid to see themselves clearly. Then, she thinks that she must be in a very strange mood because she doesn't usually have thoughts like that.

Does she?

She shakes her head, smoothes down her dress, watching the folds of the skirt rustle coyly against her thighs. It’s very pretty and very girly, and Kairi's brain hurts a little, because that shade of red reminds her of something.

Whatever it is doesn’t come to mind. She shrugs and pulls the zipper down.

(she can't help but think: do I even like dresses?)

*

Sometimes, when Kairi dreams of the boy she can’t remember, she wakes with a vision of lights like stars falling around her, as though the heavens were softly weeping. She wonders if the tears were meant to heal.

(she wonders if she is going insane)

*

"Kairi, you okay?"

Kairi's fingers are cold against the window pane, pressing against the glass as if the night sky outside is pressing against it in turn. As if she might reach out and touch, sink her hand into the dark and find answers if only she were brave enough. She looks out at the stars and frowns.

"Was I always this weak?" she asks before she knows that she was even questioning. She blinks, startled, but waits for Selphie's answer.

"I...what? You're not weak, Kairi!"

Kairi shakes her head, glares at the stars, pale light in the black heavens. Her heart aches, something sorrowful, and she hates it, _hates_ it, this feeling of melancholy longing. "I'm supposed to be doing something," she whispers, fierce. "But I...can't. Why?"

Selphie comes up close to her side, looks out with her. She doesn't understand, but she tries.

(once, she was more than this)

*

Wakka is sheepish and hopeful. It makes Kairi feel horrible because she can't. She _can't_.

There is someone that belongs inside her heart already. She tries to think of his face, to remember, but she can’t. Still, she _knows_. It's strange, actually, how strongly she feels it. It's all heart-felt instinct, a visceral reaction. Trying to put it logically is almost beyond her.

“Is there someone else?” he asks, reading into her silence.

“I…”

Kairi remembers...Riku. 

He's one reason, though a little fuzzy on the edges. Memories that feel half-complete, like something else is _missing_. That’s the other reason, the one she can’t recall. But, still. She knows she can't say yes to anyone else; they belong to her, Riku and this nameless, faceless boy, and all the wonders of the stars beyond the dark. 

Wakka has no place in her heart.

"I'm sorry."

(she is so tired of waiting)

*

Finally, she remembers: Sora and Riku and Kairi.

"Why do beginnings have to be so hard," she asks the sea. Dark portals are her answer. It's answer enough.

Because they _are_.

(she begins)


End file.
